Texas woman smuggled monkey in ‘beer’ box at Mexican border

A Texas woman has pleaded guilty to some monkey business at the US-Mexico border.

Savannah Nicole Valdez, 20, was accused of smuggling a live spider monkey into the United States inside a beer box, running from border guards and then being busted when she tried to peddle the simian online, officials said.

The Katy, Texas, woman was first spotted trying to pull her scheme on March 21 at the Gateway International Bridge in Brownsville, Texas, when authorities noticed the suspicious box in her car.

She told them she was carrying beer that she bought in Mexico, but the border agents weren’t fooled – noticing holes in the wooden box.

When they opened the enclosure, they discovered the live spider monkey inside and instructed Valdez to pull over.

But the woman refused and sped off, running a traffic light and “nearly colliding with officers and other vehicles,” officials said.

“Later that day, agents found multiple online postings advertising the sale of the spider monkey in the Katy and Houston areas with Valdez’s phone number listed in the advertisements,” the Immigration and Customs Enforcement said in a statement.

Savannah Nicole Valdez, 20, of Texas, tried to smuggle this spider monkey into the US by claiming the box it was in was carrying beer.
ICE
Smuggled spider monkey
“The monkey was ultimately recovered and placed with an animal shelter in the Central Florida area,” officials said.
ICE

A week later, she tuned herself in and admitted that she had smuggled the primate and fled the scene.

“The monkey was ultimately recovered and placed with an animal shelter in the Central Florida area,” officials said.

Valdez pleaded guilty this month to smuggling wildlife into the US without first declaring and invoicing it, as well as  fleeing an immigration checkpoint.

“Smuggling in endangered species for commercial gain is a tragic crime against nature’s precious resources,” Acting Special Agent in Charge Craig Larrabee said in a statement.

Valdez faces up to 20 years in federal prison and a possible $250,000 maximum fine when she is sentenced Jan. 25.

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Bar owner sprints after runaway keg barrels

This might have been a beer drinker’s worst nightmare.

A bar owner was caught on video sprinting after runaway beer kegs that began rolling down the street.

Dan McCallion owns the Abercorn Bar in Londonberry, Northern Ireland — and got himself in a pickle when he noticed that his keg barrels were rolling down the street.

The 56-year-old had stacked some empty keg barrels outside his place.

Yet the wind picked up and blew the barrels down the street. 

After hearing an odd rattling noise, McCallion — who had been inside the bar — decided to go outside and investigate. 

When he got outside, the kegs were already tumbling down the road.

In security camera footage, McCallion can be seen running out of his bar and right into the street after the barrels. 

Security cameras caught beer kegs rolling away due to high winds.
Kennedy News and Media

“I thought it could have done severe damage to parked cars or caused a crash if I hadn’t stopped them,” he said. 

As an avid cycler, McCallion said he luckily had the leg strength to catch up with the kegs — but he took a tough tumble himself.

The footage shows the owner tripping, falling to the ground — while still managing to grab the kegs with his arms and legs.

Dan McCallion is seen running after two of his kegs.
Kennedy News and Media
McCallion couldn’t catch up to the keg as he fell on the road.
Kennedy News and Media

“I went down to grab one and lost my footing,” he said.

“I grabbed it and got it stopped, and then I threw my leg out and stopped the other one.”

McCallion noted that he did sprain his ankle and hurt his shoulder — but today he finds comic relief in watching the video of himself chasing the rolling barrels. 

“I got a little sprain on my ankle and hurt my shoulder because of the tumble. I only started laughing when we put the video together,” he said. 

“It’s funny to watch it back.”

The Abercorn Bar where Dan McCallion’s pursuit of the runaway keg began.
Kennedy News/Google Maps

McCallion successfully captured the barrels and brought them back to the bar.

One person commented on the viral video, saying, “Well done, Daniel. Going way above and beyond the call of duty.” 

Another jokingly wrote, “Is he all right? I’d bet he’s a barrel of laughs after that!”

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